In a crazy way I am thankful for my diagnosis. I know this sounds like I have joined the crazy side of life but if it weren't for my diagnosis my family would not have taken the initiative to go to a dermatologist. Since my diagnosis, two family members have had surgery to remove lesions. One family member has had a displastic lesion removed and another family member has had 3 surgeries in the last couple of months to remove basal cell cancers. This is the one and only bright side of an awful diagnosis. If my dear loved ones are followed closely, even if something bad is diagnosed, it will be small and manageable. For this I am extremely grateful.
It has been a very busy week, working alone all week. As most of you know I am a Clinical Nurse Specialist in the field of ENT, so I see lots of patients everyday. But being alone this week has given me time to reflect on this past year and how far I have come from last year at this time. Last year at this time I was forced to discontinue Interferon because of severe liver complications. This year I can truly say that I am almost back to my pre-diagnosis self. To be honest, I never thought that I could ever come close to feeling like myself again. I usually possess unlimited energy which was gone for a very long time. Sure, I worked full time and continued to keep my home and take care of my husband but I had no energy to enjoy any of the pastimes I have always loved. Thank God this is slowly resolving.
It has been a challenging several months also as I have had another wide excision for yet another basal cell cancer and 4 more biopsies. One of the lingering side effects of Interferon is delayed healing of wounds. The wide excision took a full 10 weeks to heal. It is a very ugly scar but I truly don't worry about that. To me they are all badges and battle wounds that I don't hide anymore. Many times, my scars have initiated inquiries by my patients and I then have the opportunity to teach them about sun facts and the importance of sunscreen.
These last few months have also been filled with wonderful opportunities to travel. We have been to Ogunquit, Maine, Martha's Vineyard and the Bahamas and with each trip I have felt stronger and stronger. This has been such a blessing as my husbands loves to travel. He has been my rock and my motivation to push myself to do as much as possible.
We had to say goodbye to my constant companion and protector, my most loyal sidekick, Buddy. This was so hard to do. He was my shadow during chemo. He would stay right by my side as soon as I would get home. He was such a wonderful pet and he had quite a personality. My patients loved to hear my "Buddy" stories, so much so that he had his own facebook page under the name Buddy Collette. When he died he took a piece of my heart with him. I will miss him forever.
Our anniversary is coming up. My Norm and I were married 2 years ago on the Saturday after Thanksgiving. This has always been my favorite holiday and knew that when he asked me to marry him, it would have to be near Thanksgiving. Last year, on our first anniversary, I was too ill to celebrate, so my Norm is making sure that this year we have a couple of weeks worth of celebrations, from special dinners to a Christmas Concert by Manheim Steamroller and finally he will be taking me to see Celtic Thunder, also one of my favorites. Life is indeed good. And we are truly blessed.
So the main purpose of this post is to emphasize that there can be a good life after a devastating diagnosis. Mind you, this is not without it's challenges and normal life never returns. The new routine must include multiple Doctor's visits, multiple invasive tests and the countless hours of worries waiting for test results. Having said that, there is nothing sweeter than doing the most mundane tasks knowing that you can do them. Just being able to get up each morning and face a busy day is a blessing the depth of which there are no words.
Wishing you all a very Happy Thanksgiving and a Blessed Christmas Holiday.
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